My Child Is Anxious – When Should I Start Being Worried About This?
Kids are under a lot of pressure. As they grow older, more and more responsibilities are placed on them. They need to perform well in school, develop extracurricular activities, and eventually hold part-time jobs. It’s normal to occasionally feel anxiety. But if your child is preoccupied by worries, nervousness, and distress, it might be time to seek help.
Symptoms of anxiety
Everyone experiences anxiety at some point. We’re put into stressful situations every day, and our minds and bodies respond in certain ways. Key symptoms of anxiety are:
Racing thoughts
Restlessness and nervousness
Trouble concentrating
Having a sense of impending doom
Inability to think beyond what’s causing the worry
Increased heart rate
Insomnia
Sweating
Gastrointestinal issues
There are many categories of anxiety disorders, such as generalized anxiety, agoraphobia, panic disorder, and social anxiety. Often, children exhibit different symptoms of mental health issues than adults do. They sometimes have a harder time saying exactly what they’re feeling, so you may notice your child showing more physical symptoms.
Behaviors you should be concerned about
Excessive worrying
Kids worry about tests and performances as they come up. Important dates can make anyone nervous. But someone with anxiety will be persistently distressed about an event even if it’s far away or has already passed. Often, they can’t let things go. If your child is worried about standardized tests a year in advance or can’t sleep after a talent show because they’re upset about how they performed, they may have anxiety.
Recurring illnesses
It might be easier for your child to talk about their body than their emotions. Pay attention to whether they’re always getting headaches, feeling butterflies in their stomach, or have trouble sleeping. You may also notice them having stomach upset, colds that won’t go away, or excessive sleepiness during the day. They might be going to the school nurse’s office too often or staying home from school whenever possible. These can all be signs that they’re suffering from anxiety, and their immune system is functioning less as a result.
Extreme fears
Anxiety is often described as being out of proportion to the stressful situation. This is especially true with anxious children. As an example, let’s say you’re going out of town for a work trip. It’s normal for your kid to miss you. But an anxious child would probably catastrophize. They may begin to worry about terrible things happening to you and that they’ll never see you again. Their minds will go to the extreme end of implausible scenarios, instead of realizing that a weekend away is a normal part of your lives.
Perfectionism
We tend not to see perfectionism as a sign that something’s wrong. In reality, anxious people are often perfectionists. They view making mistakes as a fundamental flaw in themselves, which means doing any task is high stakes. Children who are perfectionists tend to be controlling and irritable. They may even have trouble completing tasks because they’re too worried about doing that task badly.
How to talk to your child
If you suspect your kid may be suffering from anxiety, you should start a conversation with them. Let them know it’s normal for people to feel worried from time to time, and that you have your own anxieties and stressors. Reassure them that things will be okay in the end. You’re a safe space for them and providing stability will get them to open up about their emotions. Practice self-care routines with them, and make time for fun, stress-relieving activities together.
Getting help
If your reassurances aren’t enough to stem their anxieties, they might benefit from speaking to a child therapist. You could even consider doing family therapy together. They’ll learn healthy coping mechanisms and how to recognize their stress responses.
To learn more about how anxiety therapy can help your child address their worries, please reach out to us.
